Episode 24 | The Selfish Pokemon Trainer and Friendly Fire | Ironing Out The Kinks Podcast
🔥 Welcome back, you filthy lot! 🔥
Buckle up (or, more accurately, unbuckle) because this episode of Ironing Out The Kinks is bringing the heat. From steamy sex clubs to unexpected Pokémon-related betrayal, we’re covering all things naughty, shocking, and downright hilarious. So, if you’re ready for a rollercoaster of juicy confessions, bad gift-giving, and some eyebrow-raising friendly fire—let’s dive in. 😏
🎟️ First Stop: The Sex Club Express!
One of our lovely (and very sexually adventurous) listeners slid into our inbox with a simple yet thoroughly exciting request: Where can I find the best sex parties in London? 🍆🏩🔥
Well, my dear hedonist-in-the-making, you’re in luck! We’ve got you covered with a brand new directory of sex clubs and parties across the UK. 🥳 Whether you’re looking for an elegant masquerade affair or a get-in, get-off, get-out kinda vibe, we’ve listed them all. But, before you charge through those doors expecting an instant orgy buffet, let’s talk expectation management:
👉 Some clubs have strict rules about single men—so, gents, don’t assume you can just rock up and whip it out. 😬
👉 These events are social! Mingle, flirt, and build up some chemistry—think sexy networking, not just Netflix & chill but make it public.
👉 Follow their social media to stay in the loop—because you don’t want to miss a gangbang notification, do you? 🤭
So, for anyone else craving an X-rated adventure, head to our website for all the details! And if you go, we wanna hear ALL the dirty deets! (Consent is sexy, so no sharing names, just steamy stories, please. 😉)
🛏️ Naughty Corner: When House Guests Get Too Comfortable
Imagine this: You throw a lovely Christmas party, and two of your guests decide to christen your spare bed with… let’s call it passionate holiday cheer. 🎄💦
No problem, right? Except—they leave the evidence behind. 👀
Our listener found the aftermath of their guests’ intimate activities (aka bodily fluids galore) splattered across the sheets. And to top it off? The guilty parties denied it at first. Like babes, the CSI team isn’t needed to solve this one… 🕵️♀️
Look, if you’re gonna get freaky in someone else’s home: ✔️ At least strip the damn bed!
✔️ Maybe throw in a sheepish "Oops, my bad!"
✔️ And, for the love of lube, don’t act like the host is weird for asking!
Verdict: Our listener is NOT a dick, but their inconsiderate guests definitely deserve a sticky reprimand. 🙃
🎁 When Your Boyfriend Gifts Himself… Your Christmas Present?!
Ladies and gentlemen, gather round for a masterclass in WHAT NOT TO DO during the holidays. 🎄
One of our listeners shared their Christmas disappointment after their boyfriend pulled off the ultimate act of selfish gift-giving:
👉 She asked for beauty products and a hoodie.
👉 He got her… Pokémon cards.
👉 THREE booster packs, to be exact.
👉 Which he then opened. For himself.
This man really went full "I choose YOU... but actually, I choose ME!" on Christmas Day. 🤦♀️
When confronted, he gaslit her with "But babe, these were expensive!" and tried to make HER feel guilty.
Gents, take note: If your girl asks for skincare, she doesn’t mean rare Charizard cards. The only thing she wants to "evolve" is her collection of beauty serums, not your trading card deck. 🙃
Pro tip: Want revenge? Buy yourself a new makeup set next Christmas and let him "unwrap" that lesson in reciprocity. 🎁
📲 A Kinky Confession: The Sexting Three-Way That Wasn’t
One of our deliciously daring listeners shared a steamy hotel encounter where sexting, a boyfriend, and an unsuspecting best friend all merged into one unforgettable session.
💬 Imagine this:
You're casually texting your mate, swapping life updates.
They mention they got absolutely wrecked by their partner that morning.
You’re like, "YES, girl, get it!"
Your boyfriend, who has a praise kink and knows she’s seen his dick, overhears.
Suddenly, he’s very inspired to give you the best session of your life. 😏
Your mate unknowingly becomes an interactive third-party in your dirty little fantasy.
Conclusion: These two are 1000% on their way to a threesome within the next six months. Let’s just call it manifesting. 🔥👀
😂 Oops, Wrong Hole! A Confession With Extra… Friendly Fire
A wild night out led to a mildly awkward friendly fire situation between two mates and an eager partner. 🍆🍑👀
What started as a two-man team effort quickly turned into a case of misplaced aim—one guy finishing all over his mate’s bare chest in an unfortunate cocktail of camaraderie. 🫣
Now, that’s brotherhood.
His response? Wipe it off with a sofa cushion and power through. Dedication or desperation? You decide. 😅
❓ Would You Rather…? A Family-Friendly (Not Really) Dilemma
This week’s Would You Rather sparked some serious discomfort:
Would you rather:
🔴 Travel back in time to watch your parents conceive you (no closing your eyes—you get the full sensory experience), OR
🔵 Have your parents receive a notification every time you orgasm?
Let's just say… most people chose the text notifications—though some feared their parents would block them faster than a bad Tinder match. 🚫😂
That’s a Wrap, You Kinky Legends! 🎤
Loved this episode? Want to share your own confessions, naughty dilemmas, or absolute sex fails?
🔥 Submit them on our website: iotk.fun 🔥
And if you haven’t already:
✔️ Follow us on all socials (@IroningOutTheKinks)
✔️ Rate & review the podcast (you know you wanna!)
✔️ Tell your filthy-minded friends!
Let’s keep smashing those taboos (and other things 😏). Until next time, stay kinky, stay curious, and always remember to strip the damn bed! 😘💦