Episode 25 | The Unwelcome Neighbour and The Thread of Disagreement | Ironing Out The Kinks Podcast
Welcome back, kinky legends! 🎙️ Ironing Out the Kinks is here with another steamy, scandalous, and slightly unhinged episode that’ll leave you questioning your life choices (in the best way possible). This week, we’re diving into unexpected makeout sessions, suspiciously friendly texts, and the real number of erections a man has per day (spoiler: it’s more than you’d think 👀).
So, grab your whips, wine, and questionable decision-making skills – let’s get into it.
🔥 The Naughty Corner: Surprise Snogs & Shady Setups
Ever been ambushed by a surprise kiss? No, not the romantic movie moment kind – we’re talking about the WTF-just-happened kind. One listener found themselves in an unexpected tongue-tornado with their boyfriend’s “just a friend” neighbor. 😳
Let’s set the scene:
✅ Drinks are flowing 🍷
✅ Compliments are escalating 🤭
✅ Boyfriend mysteriously leaves the room 🤨
✅ BAM – full-on mouth invasion 💋💀
Oh, and the kicker? Boyfriend had hooked up with this "friend" before, conveniently forgetting to mention that little detail. 😬 When confronted, his response was basically, “Take it as a compliment.” 🤯 Excuse us while we grab our pitchforks.
Hot take: If your partner sets you up for what he clearly hoped would be a spontaneous threesome, only to then gaslight you when you’re uncomfortable, 🚩🚩🚩. As we always say, dump him and move on, babes. 🚮
📱 Texting & Trust Issues: When “Just Friends” Feels a Bit Too Friendly
Another listener is dealing with a different kind of shady behavior – her boyfriend’s non-stop texting with a mutual female friend. 📱🤨
Now, we’re all for men and women being friends (groundbreaking, we know 🙄). But if your man is texting another woman all day, every day, while you’re just getting the occasional "hey babe" – we have questions.
⚠️ Are they discussing their undying love for croissants, or is she sending him goodnight texts while you’re lying next to him?
⚠️ Does she just REALLY love texting, or is she waiting for an opportunity to "accidentally" fall onto his lap?
Our advice? Talk it out. If he gets overly defensive, side-eyes will be activated. If he’s open and reassuring, maybe it really is just innocent. 🤷♀️ Either way, communication is key – and if your gut is telling you something’s off, don’t ignore it.
🧠 Sex Trivia: Test Your Kinky Knowledge
It wouldn’t be an Ironing Out the Kinks episode without a ridiculous quiz. This week’s fun facts included:
🔥 True or False: During sex, your nose swells as much as your genitals. (Yes, really.) 👃🍆
🔥 How many times a day does the average man get an erection? (Hint: It’s 20! Some of you overestimated wildly 👀😂)
🔥 How many calories in a teaspoon of semen? (It’s 5 – basically a low-calorie protein shake, ladies! 🥤)
Did you guess any of them right? If so, congrats, you filthy genius. 🏆 If not, well… there’s always next time.
🎤 Final Thoughts: Stop Ignoring Red Flags & Start Having Fun
Another episode, another deep dive into the chaotic world of relationships, trust issues, and unexpected tongue attacks. If you take anything away from today’s episode, let it be this:
❤️ If they’re hiding things, it’s shady.
❤️ If they don’t respect your feelings, it’s a red flag.
❤️ And if your partner suddenly disappears mid-party and their friend starts getting handsy – RUN.
Until next time, stay sexy, stay curious, and for the love of all things kinky – stop dating idiots. 💋
🎙️ Listen now on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your fix.
See you next week, filthmongers. 😈🎧